The Last Mon Standing

I guess ill just fallow the advice of the popular chocolate coated wafer… HAVE A BREAK…

I am giving meself a short hiatus from blogging… since i have to concentrate on my studies (JOKE)… i am just busy with my new org and hospitalo internship and stuffs… and the new blog that i am writing (anonymously)…

but may i leave this… taken from my new blog… written about my nursing duties only…

After Lunch, Before the Last Subject

I spent my lunch today with J.A.A. and J.N.A  in a fastfood with a striped insect as its mascots. After we ate the not-so-"yummy" burger and salty fries we decided to stay there for a while since it was still 30 minutes before our next subject (pharmacology). We were chatting when we saw our two former blockmates, J.L.M. and A.M.  walking toward us cladded in all white Nursing uniforms, unlike us, who were wearing civillian clothing since our duty is on Thursday.

They sat on the seats beside our table.

J.L.M.’s patient died last Monday. I was deeply interested on how that happened so I started bombarding him with questions. I thought that his patient died because he left him for lunch. But I found out  what really happened was a very different story.

According to him, Baby Boy S.C. was a 7 and half month premature baby. He was born last July 19. The baby left the hospital that day, I am not certain whether it was suggested by the doctor or it was a HAMA (home against medical advice) though I though I think it was a HAMA case since the baby’s family is poor (the hospital is a general hospiatal, not a private) a lot of cases like this one happens since the patients’ families were unable to pay for the medicines and other hospital fees (there is no such thing as a FREE hospital service).The baby was at home when he started manifesting Severe Jaundice ( a complication common to many neonates characterized by yellow colored skin and sclera).

The baby was immediately rushed to the General Hospital.

According to J.L.M., the baby was really in a bad situation. The RR (respiratory rate) was 2bpm (beats per minute) which was really scary. The normal bpm of an adult is 16-20bpm and it increases the younger the person is.

The infant was unable to breathe by itself and so they put an ambu bag (a gadget for breathing). J.L.M. was assigned to take care of the baby. He was ordered to keep the manually operate the machine (it is use by squeezing air in it).

He diligently obeyed the order and gave it to another student nurse when he was about to eat his lunch. When he returned after lunch, it was now the doctor who was manually operatiung the apparatus. He said that the baby’s granmother asked the doctor to stop it since they know that the child will eventually die. And everything happened.

Yes it was a euthanasia.

I was deeply bothered by J,L.M.’s story… I am so much against in mercy killing, abortion, and even death penalty.

I strongly agree with what has been taught to us by our CI (clinical instructor) last summer…

"A nurse is his patient’s advocate."

Meaning, we should in everyway promote our patient’s wellfare and not the welfare of his family. We should not care about the financial problems or anything about client’s family, as long as our patient is getting the ultimate care that he well deserves.

But, nevertheless, things like this, though illegal and unaccepted here in the Philippines, are inevitable… and they continue to happen.

AAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!

my hands are sweating… cold…

i should be speaking in english… but im not…

my knees were trembling…

my bones were rattling…

and he asked his next question…

"anong masasabi mo sa mga taong iniisip na mayabang ka?" (what can you say to those people who think you’re a strut?)… i knew it… he thinks im strutting… im all this nervbous and tense and he’s thinking im confident… DARN IT!! i should not have tried… i should not have thought of it… now i am AARGHING AGAIN!!!

inhale…

exhale..

breathe in..

breathe out…

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG

GGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

this is what i hated most… REJECTION… rejection due to an unfounded first impression…

the rest of the last two weeks of my so called "break" between my summer class and the coming 1st semester were spent entirely in preparation and practice for the capping and candlelighting (and pinning- i should add that) ceremony for incoming junior nursing students.

and finally, yesterday, the culminating event happened…

we were all clad in white… white uniform, white slacks, white leathershoes for the boys (add the white hanky and the white underwear that i was wearing) and white uniform, white stockings, white leathershoes and white aprons for girls…

i was especially thrilled when i finally got my hands on my new for-hospital-duty uniform the day before yesterday. i excitedly fit them at home but to my horror.. AARGH.. the slacks was three inches shorter, and i have to let half of the length of the zipper open because it didnt fit my waist. considering that i am thin, this predicament was far from my expectations.

i manage to wear them anyway… i was soooooooooo excited to be deterred by that miniscule problem… the next day promises a more exciting day…

and so i thought… i woke up at 6:00AM with burning sensation above my lips under my left nostril… i touched it and felt a small protuberent rising from my skin… "no way!" i told myself… i immediately straightened up and ran to the nearest mirror… "no way!" i said aloud… what i was dreading happened… a pimple… no i think it’s worse… a folliculitis with a green pus filled nodule ballooning from its center just popped up from nowhere… how could this happen to me… on this special day.. AARRGGH!!

i lazily went back to bed… hoping that that was only a nightmare… the time for the capping ceremony was on 1:00 PM so i thought i still have plenty of time, afterall there was a mass before it..

after about an hour i decided to wake up and succumbed myself in front of the TV… suddenly the whole capping and pinning thing was not that important anymore. seconds smoothly turned into minutes… and minutes rapidly changed to hours- hours of watching TV. i was so preoccupied by the television that i didnt realize that it was 11:30 already… and i am going to travel for one and a half hour…

i hurriedly woke up my sister who was going with me… and immediately took a bath… we decided to take a faster bus-the airconditioned one with a minimum fare of 75pesos (we only commute ok)…

before we went out of the house, i decided to phone S, she told me that the time was changed to 3:00 (the mass at 2), and that was such a great relief…

we were at the place at 2:30 and the mass was still going on, i was wearing my all white uniform and if not because of the stupid folliculitis, i would have been dead gorgeous have been more comfortable…

but anyway, i was so happy especially when the guy who put the pin on my chest congratulated me… two years ago this would have been a very big joke to me… but on that moment i’ve realized that this was a very big step of a realization of a dream… a dream of becoming a nurse… i am sooo excited and nervous of what the future holds for me… but then… i will try to conquer the coming challenges for my calling… for the noble proffessoion of nursing (i once planned of continuing my course to medicin, but now, i forgot all about that plan… i am going to be a nurse and that is) yey…

you can just imagine how much pride i had that night while singing the philippine nurses hymn… (on top of my voice)

i am an avid reader of six blogs…

and i just want you to enjoy them as much as i enjoy reading them…

here they are;

Bulitas Shot- this is a photoblog manned by a filipino student… i am not really certain what school he’s from but i really enjoy his creativity.

Warmstone- authored by Bingskee. i really love reading her sometimes inspiring and sometimes thought provoking entries. and i honestly thinks she’s cool.

Catterpillar Talk- written by a girl named Valerie, i think. the first time that i read her blog, i was really intrigued whether the author is a He or a She, though i had had an inclination that she’s a girl. anyway as i progress in reading her accounts of the happenings inside her cocoon, i discovered that, HEY, she’s a chick.

Chronograph- this blog was introduced to me by my friend who, interestingly, is the author’s classmate. when my eyes fell on this blog, i was immediately impressed, he writes with really great eloquence and yet he doesnt seem to lose his comic personality.

bikoy.net- i read about this blog in a newspaper. according to the news this is the longest running blog authored by a filipino male. (the longest running filipino blog is being run by a girl since 1996). this is one of the coollest blog ever… and do you remember about UNITY, COHERENCE and BREVITY, well he sure know how to fallow that rule…. and i do like the photos…

Playground- written by a half german half filipino first degree friend. this blog satarted as a compilation of the surveys that the author posted on his bulletin board. but just recently, he started writing about his experiences and i really am enjoying how he views things differently.

this was the first time that i went back home from the barber without holding my stupid bangs…

because when i entered the shop, i mean when i entered the establishment’s facade, i was surprised to see the sign "the barber is OUT" just like the one you’ll see when youre visiting a doctor, or a dentist, or your personal veterenarian…

"what do i do now?" i mumbled

the reason of my unwilling but planned visit to the abominable barber was because of a special occassion on friday… ahem… my pinning ceremony (pinning and capping ceremony by the way is the extraordinary initiation rite for incoming third year nursing students… it is some sort of welcoming ceremony prior to the soon hospital internship). now, i have to make myself as presentable and as neat on that event just what a nice and smart nurse could be… so i chose to go to another barber shop…

i wheelled around the place and looked for the cheapest barber shop… and i found it…

it is run by the same wrinkled old man brewed by the antiquity of his aged-old profession… the profession and art of murdering people in front of a mirror…

the place is as dirty as my barber’s building… it has this dingy and rusty bars that’ll make you think of alcatraz… and since it is juxtaposed near the tricycle parking lot, a mob of tricycle drivers playing the "cara y cruz" use the entrance as their lowly tambayan (hangout place).

so i entered the place… i was greeted by i think the barber’s wife who was wearing a crimson headband…

i was beckoned to sit, but before i did, i immediately told him that he should prune only a few lenght from my hair and i specifiacally and plainly told him about my banms "please dont hesitate to cut it… and dont mind my humongous forehead…"

and  he did… man… i was so surprised that he didnt even made any argument…

my past motto…

it is better to cheat than to repeat

my previous motto…

i set my foot upon my enemies

my new motto…

i am not stupid, i am friendly…